How true it is when it was said no one can serve two masters. You get torn in between....
What shall I do after I graduate next year? I dont know...
If I plan my working life and investments correctly...I'll be a millionaire by mid 30's... or at 40 at max.
So whats holding me back? The urge for ministry.... time and time again i find myself clicking into bible college websites scrolling down masters and doctorate degrees...Why? I dont know. I dont want to. Or do I? If somehow I do this, I'll probably miss the millionaire dream and probably have to depend on God's grace day to day....
Can I just do both? why cant I be rich, retire..then study? why the urge to do everything at once in my youth? WIll I miss out on a calling, opportunity?
Direct my paths oh Lord, as I have the knowledge to achieve any of these dream, but I lack the wisdom to guide my own path in the right direction. I need divine wisdom, someone who can see things outside the continuum of time. Grant me purpose, grant me favour as I will bless your name in whatever ways you direct me in the future. Don't let me lose sight, let me not take my eyes off you.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Friday, June 18, 2010
Surveys
Remember how I said you can get paid for doing surveys?
Well here is one of it.
My Opinions
Basically You collect up to 6000 points then you can cash out for $50 into your paypal account which is a secure way of transfering into your bank account.
Each Survey varies by points depending on the surveyer in how much they want to pay.
But You can average out that each survey is approximately 500 points which is about $3 or so.
You get a few surveys each week...just do it for fun in your own leisure and after a month you should be able to cash it out!
Note : you have to verify your phone number and mailing address for faster transaction.
Here is the link
Be rewarded for your opinions! Join MyOpinions today!
Valued Opinions
Very Straight forward. for this one.
Each survey, they will let you know how much they are gonna pay you. Range from $2-$5 and once you reach $20 you can claim a coles myer gift card or any gift card of your choice.
Here is the link.
Click here to join Now
If they ask who was your referrer, just state my email, you might get a bonus =)
And try not to cheat, or they might ban you from participating in any further surveys.
Just do it in your leisure time, =)
Well here is one of it.
My Opinions
Basically You collect up to 6000 points then you can cash out for $50 into your paypal account which is a secure way of transfering into your bank account.
Each Survey varies by points depending on the surveyer in how much they want to pay.
But You can average out that each survey is approximately 500 points which is about $3 or so.
You get a few surveys each week...just do it for fun in your own leisure and after a month you should be able to cash it out!
Note : you have to verify your phone number and mailing address for faster transaction.
Here is the link
Be rewarded for your opinions! Join MyOpinions today!
Valued Opinions
Very Straight forward. for this one.
Each survey, they will let you know how much they are gonna pay you. Range from $2-$5 and once you reach $20 you can claim a coles myer gift card or any gift card of your choice.
Here is the link.
Click here to join Now
If they ask who was your referrer, just state my email, you might get a bonus =)
And try not to cheat, or they might ban you from participating in any further surveys.
Just do it in your leisure time, =)
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
World Cup 2010- jubilani ball
Talk of the year... the controversial Jabulani Ball..
Yes, it has been controversial at the way the ball flies in the air...why?
Well it follows the FIFA standards in terms of size, weight, water absorption,etc ...no doubt.
But regular soccer balls are built with 32 hexagonal panels but this jabulani ball has only 8 panels! This gives a very smooth flight. On top of it , it is also a very heavy ball (still within FIFA standards range.
It supposedly gives more accuracy to players.
But looking at the way the Jabulani has been flying around, most of the professional players arent able to accomate the "roundest" ball on earth and accounts to the level of football deteriorating this season.
Have a look at how smooth this Jabulani ball is..
Here is what some has to say about the ball....
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/worldcup2010/article-1285931/Jamie-Redknapp-goes-ball-istic--I-struck-World-Cup-Jabulani-exploded-boot.html#ixzz0qtH9Fuj0
As for the Socceroos...
The team that trashed Japan 3-1, drew with Coratia 2-2, had Brazil to struggle a 2-0 win and forced Italy into an injury time penalty winner in 2006 has now dissapointed fans with a 4-0 lost to Germany. Question remains...was Germany that good or was Australia just past its peak.
With the defenders averaging the age of 33, it was quite obvious they were slow at reacting to attack and stuggled with pace over the Germans.
Well, no doubt Pim Verbeek had kept his cards and will still have some tricks up his sleeve... With Harry Kewell and Bresciano kept like gold investments, waiting to be unleashed. I would have kept Cahill on the bench for the Germany game as well.. Since Germany was meant to be a loss anyway, why bother risking the good players? Well, Ghana and Serbia, here we come...
Construction
8 bonded 3d moulded Polyurethane panels make for a near-waterproof 'roundest ever' ball.Yes, it has been controversial at the way the ball flies in the air...why?
Well it follows the FIFA standards in terms of size, weight, water absorption,etc ...no doubt.
But regular soccer balls are built with 32 hexagonal panels but this jabulani ball has only 8 panels! This gives a very smooth flight. On top of it , it is also a very heavy ball (still within FIFA standards range.
It supposedly gives more accuracy to players.
But looking at the way the Jabulani has been flying around, most of the professional players arent able to accomate the "roundest" ball on earth and accounts to the level of football deteriorating this season.
Have a look at how smooth this Jabulani ball is..
Here is what some has to say about the ball....
'It is a bit like a beach ball. You cannot trust it really. With some of the goals you set the ball going off in one direction and it moves in another. As soon as you put any air into a pass it's a lottery.'
England's Michael Carrick
'It's frustrating…it makes us look like drunken sailors.'
Denmark's Daniel Agger
'The new ball is not decent, not just for goalkeepers but for everyone. Its trajectory is unpredictable.'
Italy's Gianluigi Buffon (right)
'Suddenly it changes trajectory. It's like it doesn't want to be kicked. It's incredible, like someone is guiding it. You go to kick it and it moves out of the way. I think it's supernatural, it's very bad.'
Brazil's Luis Fabiano
'It's a little sad that in a competition as big as the World Cup to have such a poor ball. It's not just goalkeepers complaining, but the outfield players too.'
Spain's Iker Casillas
'It's a catastrophe! I have played with many different balls, some of which wiggled or changed directions, but this one is the worst.'
Serbia's Vladimir Stojkovic
'You jump up to head a cross and suddenly the ball will move and you will miss it!' Italy's Giampaolo Pazzini
'It keeps you from sleeping because you are thinking about tomorrow and how you are going to manage to play with this ball.'
South Africa's Itumeleng Khune
'Adidas are not being fair on goalkeepers… This ball has a mind of its own.'
South Africa's Moeneeb Josephs
'It's terrible…like a ball from a supermarket.'
Brazil's Julio Cesar
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/worldcup2010/article-1285931/Jamie-Redknapp-goes-ball-istic--I-struck-World-Cup-Jabulani-exploded-boot.html#ixzz0qtH9Fuj0
As for the Socceroos...
The team that trashed Japan 3-1, drew with Coratia 2-2, had Brazil to struggle a 2-0 win and forced Italy into an injury time penalty winner in 2006 has now dissapointed fans with a 4-0 lost to Germany. Question remains...was Germany that good or was Australia just past its peak.
With the defenders averaging the age of 33, it was quite obvious they were slow at reacting to attack and stuggled with pace over the Germans.
Well, no doubt Pim Verbeek had kept his cards and will still have some tricks up his sleeve... With Harry Kewell and Bresciano kept like gold investments, waiting to be unleashed. I would have kept Cahill on the bench for the Germany game as well.. Since Germany was meant to be a loss anyway, why bother risking the good players? Well, Ghana and Serbia, here we come...
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Earning extra
Time to get this blog up and running again!
Ok so the past few months has been exciting. As I have embarked on a journey to make money and hopefully become a millionaire by 40 yrs old. I have found alot of ways in which you can actually make money and it has been quite facinating.
Term deposits
Lock in your term deposits if the rate is 6% and above. If money is giving you extra money..why not?It is risk free and you will not lose anything.
Shares
This is probably the best way to make money work for you. Money grows more money as what Ive learned. Having said that, it is also important to pick the right shares. Banks are probably the safest. They pay you dividends as well. If you are looking for long term investing in shares and wondering when is the right time to buy? the answer is now! Yes..in short term, price does fluctuate, but in long term, it always ends up on top. Long term for shares can be calssified as 3-5 years.
If you keep your shares for a minimum of 1 year, you only get taxed for half the profit which is really tax effective.You can also start with small amounts like $500. The return rate is also higher compare to other vehicles of investment.
Property
This really depends on where you are. I wouldnt recommend this so much in other countries, but in Australia, it is an excellent prospect. But to get into this market, you need at least 20% of the house price. Returns for this varies according to location but generally the return rate is still one of the highest but 2nd to shares.
Internet
There are also stuff you can do over the internet to earn some side income. You can advertise for companies and get paid. You can get paid to blog a certain post. You can also complete surveys and get paid.
Further notes
If you are in Australia, and you are a fraid you might lose money from shares or property, dont be afraid. There are ways to claim the loss back through tax. Haha. I'll explain how to next time.
Happy earning extra money!
=)
Ok so the past few months has been exciting. As I have embarked on a journey to make money and hopefully become a millionaire by 40 yrs old. I have found alot of ways in which you can actually make money and it has been quite facinating.
Term deposits
Lock in your term deposits if the rate is 6% and above. If money is giving you extra money..why not?It is risk free and you will not lose anything.
Shares
This is probably the best way to make money work for you. Money grows more money as what Ive learned. Having said that, it is also important to pick the right shares. Banks are probably the safest. They pay you dividends as well. If you are looking for long term investing in shares and wondering when is the right time to buy? the answer is now! Yes..in short term, price does fluctuate, but in long term, it always ends up on top. Long term for shares can be calssified as 3-5 years.
If you keep your shares for a minimum of 1 year, you only get taxed for half the profit which is really tax effective.You can also start with small amounts like $500. The return rate is also higher compare to other vehicles of investment.
Property
This really depends on where you are. I wouldnt recommend this so much in other countries, but in Australia, it is an excellent prospect. But to get into this market, you need at least 20% of the house price. Returns for this varies according to location but generally the return rate is still one of the highest but 2nd to shares.
Internet
There are also stuff you can do over the internet to earn some side income. You can advertise for companies and get paid. You can get paid to blog a certain post. You can also complete surveys and get paid.
Further notes
If you are in Australia, and you are a fraid you might lose money from shares or property, dont be afraid. There are ways to claim the loss back through tax. Haha. I'll explain how to next time.
Happy earning extra money!
=)
Wednesday, June 09, 2010
Infinity Downline
What I find funny is scamming has become so modern these days. Anyone heard of Infinity downline? haha.
Well for those who dont, it is an application on facebook where all you have to do is log in and you get $100. And this depends on how many people you get to join you. The more you get, the more money you receive. It is not a new concept, as this has been used for direct sales.
But it is fairly new idea that in this case, you dont get any product for joining to be a member!
So the Basic Idea is when you sign up you pay $100 registration fee. Each member you get to join this "club" will pay $100 membership fee as well in which you get more or less 50% commission in a way. Then the members that your members get...you get commission too...so on and so forth.
But essentially, all that is happening is, you are asking people for money, for nothing. lol. They dont get any product whatsoever. To break it down to a simpler model, All that is happening is that say for example, I am the company. I get you to pay me $100 to join my company...now you have to find people to pay you $100 (2 people) to cover up the cost you just paid. And the other 2 people has to do the same. And it keeps going on and on. What a funny loan shark scheme.
Well for those who dont, it is an application on facebook where all you have to do is log in and you get $100. And this depends on how many people you get to join you. The more you get, the more money you receive. It is not a new concept, as this has been used for direct sales.
But it is fairly new idea that in this case, you dont get any product for joining to be a member!
So the Basic Idea is when you sign up you pay $100 registration fee. Each member you get to join this "club" will pay $100 membership fee as well in which you get more or less 50% commission in a way. Then the members that your members get...you get commission too...so on and so forth.
But essentially, all that is happening is, you are asking people for money, for nothing. lol. They dont get any product whatsoever. To break it down to a simpler model, All that is happening is that say for example, I am the company. I get you to pay me $100 to join my company...now you have to find people to pay you $100 (2 people) to cover up the cost you just paid. And the other 2 people has to do the same. And it keeps going on and on. What a funny loan shark scheme.
Thursday, April 08, 2010
right and wrong
How do we define what is good and what is bad?
Seriously if things were to be left to me to decide on all things, there are some "gray" areas in life which i would struggle to say if it was good or bad.
Or do we just FEEL if something is right and wrong by depending on the peace of our heart.
Or do we determine if something is right or wrong by the outcome of it?
Or do we define what is right by the "greater good".
HOw do we actually know if something is right or wrong when we humans are corrupted, selfish people, whom none of us can say we are selfless in all aspects.
There will be situations when we tend to be more concern of ourselves than others.
In safety for example. Would we help a stranger...to the point of sacrifing our own life? Most of us would say NO. why? because there is still future ahead of us....more to live in this world...bla bla bla....
Or if its not safety, maybe its work. Who want to work and not get paid? Yes its sacrificial... but would anyone of us raise our hands and say, yes we would do that....for the long term?
In essence, we are all selfish people, to a certain extent, we do think about ourself, our own safety, our own security.
Often times, we want to get saved so that WE would not get into hell. It is to save OURself from harm. Right to our very nature, all we cared for is our own self, how high we can reach, how far we can go, how great we can be, how nice our life would be.
If all of us are selfish people, how then can we decide what is right and wrong since we only look for opportunities to meet our own desires?
I believe in the Word. And in the Word I stand. May nothing else judge me..not by anyone elses standards but only bythe Bible's standards. Search my heart Oh God, As this relationship I have with you is more than just wanting to be in Heaven with you...but because of the relationship that we have esteblished over the years and I look forward to growing deeper with you.I want to know you more, And I know that it is only by YOur word that things are made right from wrong. And it is only By your word, will you judge your people.
Take my hands and make it yours, That I may touch and heal people.
Take my mouth and make it yours, That I may speak life into people.
Take my feet and make it yours, That I may walk anywhere you ask me to.
Take my eyes and make it yours, That I may see the works you are doing in others.
Take my ears and tune it to you, That I may hear you every second of the day.
Noone will make sense of my life...unless they know you
Hold me close..and let your love surround me..
Seriously if things were to be left to me to decide on all things, there are some "gray" areas in life which i would struggle to say if it was good or bad.
Or do we just FEEL if something is right and wrong by depending on the peace of our heart.
Or do we determine if something is right or wrong by the outcome of it?
Or do we define what is right by the "greater good".
HOw do we actually know if something is right or wrong when we humans are corrupted, selfish people, whom none of us can say we are selfless in all aspects.
There will be situations when we tend to be more concern of ourselves than others.
In safety for example. Would we help a stranger...to the point of sacrifing our own life? Most of us would say NO. why? because there is still future ahead of us....more to live in this world...bla bla bla....
Or if its not safety, maybe its work. Who want to work and not get paid? Yes its sacrificial... but would anyone of us raise our hands and say, yes we would do that....for the long term?
In essence, we are all selfish people, to a certain extent, we do think about ourself, our own safety, our own security.
Often times, we want to get saved so that WE would not get into hell. It is to save OURself from harm. Right to our very nature, all we cared for is our own self, how high we can reach, how far we can go, how great we can be, how nice our life would be.
If all of us are selfish people, how then can we decide what is right and wrong since we only look for opportunities to meet our own desires?
I believe in the Word. And in the Word I stand. May nothing else judge me..not by anyone elses standards but only bythe Bible's standards. Search my heart Oh God, As this relationship I have with you is more than just wanting to be in Heaven with you...but because of the relationship that we have esteblished over the years and I look forward to growing deeper with you.I want to know you more, And I know that it is only by YOur word that things are made right from wrong. And it is only By your word, will you judge your people.
Take my hands and make it yours, That I may touch and heal people.
Take my mouth and make it yours, That I may speak life into people.
Take my feet and make it yours, That I may walk anywhere you ask me to.
Take my eyes and make it yours, That I may see the works you are doing in others.
Take my ears and tune it to you, That I may hear you every second of the day.
Noone will make sense of my life...unless they know you
Hold me close..and let your love surround me..
Monday, March 22, 2010
fulfill your prophesy Lord.
God,
I am beginning to see your prophecies unfolding.
Not to long ago I was wondering how were things to unfold.
Now I begin to understand that it is all in your time.
But Lord, whether or not I will live to see your prophecy fulfilled, I will choose to love you more each day. Whether you continue to whisper in my ear the secrets of your heart, I wil choose to love you more each day.
You have tested me, beyond what I can imagine. And yes I have failed so many times. I begin to know how weak I am without you. That I need you to draw strength from.
Lord work in me, take away the weeds in my heart. I want to be stronger. I want to be better.
I dont want to impress any man. May no one on earth find favour in me except you Lord. May I be despised, put down and tested and still find favour in you. I am here to please no one except you.
Thanks for equipping me with the gifts to equip your saints.Thanks for circumstances that have shapped me to who I am today. I shall not be content with my level of relationship with you. I want to go deeper. I want to know your hearts desire. I want to know the secrets of your heart. I want more of you. Let me prophesy to the nations, and lead them back to you. Teach me while I am in my youth. mould me so that I may not fail you once you put me up there. I want to stumble no one but only to bring glory to your name.
Destroy this house if I have built it on wrong foundation. Build me up again God. Restore me in the fullness of your glory. Give me insight and let me see what you are doing in people's lives. That I may do what the father does.
You have always led me. Up till now, you have always been guiding me and never have I made the wrong turn and never will I want to. Every decision , every step has led me to where I am today. Continue to lead me Lord. So that through your servant, your will may be accomplished.
I live....only to fulfill your will.
I am beginning to see your prophecies unfolding.
Not to long ago I was wondering how were things to unfold.
Now I begin to understand that it is all in your time.
But Lord, whether or not I will live to see your prophecy fulfilled, I will choose to love you more each day. Whether you continue to whisper in my ear the secrets of your heart, I wil choose to love you more each day.
You have tested me, beyond what I can imagine. And yes I have failed so many times. I begin to know how weak I am without you. That I need you to draw strength from.
Lord work in me, take away the weeds in my heart. I want to be stronger. I want to be better.
I dont want to impress any man. May no one on earth find favour in me except you Lord. May I be despised, put down and tested and still find favour in you. I am here to please no one except you.
Thanks for equipping me with the gifts to equip your saints.Thanks for circumstances that have shapped me to who I am today. I shall not be content with my level of relationship with you. I want to go deeper. I want to know your hearts desire. I want to know the secrets of your heart. I want more of you. Let me prophesy to the nations, and lead them back to you. Teach me while I am in my youth. mould me so that I may not fail you once you put me up there. I want to stumble no one but only to bring glory to your name.
Destroy this house if I have built it on wrong foundation. Build me up again God. Restore me in the fullness of your glory. Give me insight and let me see what you are doing in people's lives. That I may do what the father does.
You have always led me. Up till now, you have always been guiding me and never have I made the wrong turn and never will I want to. Every decision , every step has led me to where I am today. Continue to lead me Lord. So that through your servant, your will may be accomplished.
I live....only to fulfill your will.
Monday, August 17, 2009
Mistakes?
Unfolding a new chapter of life would not be possible without the speculation of its ending. But what becomes more gratifying is the plot that has lead up to this frame of time. It is nothing new to be looking forward to how life will lead but it is futile if we do not recognize how life has puzzled itself through the many thicks and thins, rough and smooth times to bring about into production of our character in which we are defined today.
The proposition of life having all seemingly insignificant moments of life becomes surprisingly significant in another frame of time. Through all the mishaps, mistakes, misjudgements made, it has but became lessons in which we learned in practicality rather than throratically. They were classrooms without the four walls. Yes they were mistakes, but because something was gleaned from it, there will be no regrets.
Life afterall is a choice.Because of choice, there was room made for mistakes. Because there was room for mistakes, we need a guide. Because we need a guide, we were given the Word. God, the source of wisdom, knew choices can be devastating but yet can be the most phenomenal experience if used wisely.With choice, Adam sinned and with choice, Jesus saved.
And because of choice, we can love. and Love is God.
-Sean
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Something to share
Is there Something you like to share,
Being the one I love, cherish and care,
Day til night I will always be there,
In your suffering I too will bear,
Alone on my knees I often ask God,
Not knowing He knew what I sought,
Every night I prayed to the Lord,
Release thy blessings through thy sword
Ask and you shall receive He said,
I took His word and boldly prayed,
Send me someone from heaven today,
Apart from everything Lord have your way,
Thank You God for answering my prayer that day.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Beautiful Soul
I don't want another pretty face
I don't want just anyone to hold
I don't want my love to go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You're the one I wanna chase
You're the one I wanna hold
I wont let another minute go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
I know that you are something special
To you I'd be always faithful
I want to be what you always needed
Then I hope you'll see the heart in me
I don't want another pretty face
I don't want just anyone to hold
I don't want my love to go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You're the one I wanna chase
You're the one I wanna hold
I wont let another minute go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
Your beautiful soul, yeah
You might need time to think it over
But im just fine moving forward
I'll ease your mind
If you give me the chance
I will never make you cry c`mon lets try
I don't want another pretty face
I don't want just anyone to hold
I don't want my love to go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You're the one I wanna chase
You're the one I wanna hold
I wont let another minute go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
Am I crazy for wanting you
Baby do you think you could want me too
I don't wanna waste your time
Do you see things the way I do
I just wanna know if you feel it too
There is nothing left to hide
I don't want another pretty face
I don't want just anyone to hold
I don't want my love to go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You're the one I wanna chase
You're the one I wanna hold
I wont let another minute go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You beautiful soul, yeah.
I don't want just anyone to hold
I don't want my love to go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You're the one I wanna chase
You're the one I wanna hold
I wont let another minute go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
I know that you are something special
To you I'd be always faithful
I want to be what you always needed
Then I hope you'll see the heart in me
I don't want another pretty face
I don't want just anyone to hold
I don't want my love to go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You're the one I wanna chase
You're the one I wanna hold
I wont let another minute go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
Your beautiful soul, yeah
You might need time to think it over
But im just fine moving forward
I'll ease your mind
If you give me the chance
I will never make you cry c`mon lets try
I don't want another pretty face
I don't want just anyone to hold
I don't want my love to go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You're the one I wanna chase
You're the one I wanna hold
I wont let another minute go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
Am I crazy for wanting you
Baby do you think you could want me too
I don't wanna waste your time
Do you see things the way I do
I just wanna know if you feel it too
There is nothing left to hide
I don't want another pretty face
I don't want just anyone to hold
I don't want my love to go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You're the one I wanna chase
You're the one I wanna hold
I wont let another minute go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You beautiful soul, yeah.
From the album Beautiful Soul by Jesse McCartney.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Cast my burdens...
my exam is next week and I barely know anything. I dont have time. No wait I have time but too many things are going on at the same time. This time im really being pushed to my max. Ive got to get a house within this week, get electricity, internet, gas, water, have to clean the house,. Yet, my exam is next week, and on top of that, all these silly things happening around me. Im tired, but i cant take a break. My exams in a few more days...4 days to be exact. Know nuts about it.
God help me. I need to balance all of these that is happening around me. God you hold everything together. You said in Your word that the whole creation is held together by your power. In you all things exist, and because of You all things exist. Situation may be tough mentally, physically and emotionally but I know that through my weakness, I will know Your strength. Help me to focus on my exams and give me understanding on the things I read. Grant me my picture memory again so I wont have to keep reading the same thing over and over again to memorize it. Whatever the results will be, may everyone know that it was not my works but Your handiwork that was working.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Thursday, June 04, 2009
Time
Time...it needs it to build and yet because of it destroys. Careful steps taken yet, got too tangled up. Who am I doing it for...Why am I doing it? I had the right focus but somehow it strayed as suddenly I begin to think I could have gotten more. Emotionally tangled. But I am getting there..
rethink..refocus... forget what I could have...cuz I know He prepares the best and I wouldnt settle for second best. Every step I have taken thus far was all led by Him. I realize how far it has strayed without Him as my focus.
God, take away my distractions. bring me to your solitary place again. Too many pending decisions and I cant decide without your guidance as I will always make wrong decisions without your consultation. Relinquish me from my own captivity and bring me to another level of dependance on you.
13th June nearing and its gonna be time to do some car shopping. By now, after nearly 21 yrs I think I know what cars I dont want. Dont think Im sure I know what car I want yet.lol.... God, are you finished with my car yet? when will it be ready?lol..everything is about time isnt it.
Time...it needs it to build and yet because of it destroys.
rethink..refocus... forget what I could have...cuz I know He prepares the best and I wouldnt settle for second best. Every step I have taken thus far was all led by Him. I realize how far it has strayed without Him as my focus.
God, take away my distractions. bring me to your solitary place again. Too many pending decisions and I cant decide without your guidance as I will always make wrong decisions without your consultation. Relinquish me from my own captivity and bring me to another level of dependance on you.
13th June nearing and its gonna be time to do some car shopping. By now, after nearly 21 yrs I think I know what cars I dont want. Dont think Im sure I know what car I want yet.lol.... God, are you finished with my car yet? when will it be ready?lol..everything is about time isnt it.
Time...it needs it to build and yet because of it destroys.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
I know
I know whats happening.
I know what happened.I know but I pretend not to know. Or do I really know? I am certain...very certain ....or am I? Even if it is so, why then does it feel this way? Why then does it have to be this way. Why do I have to see things and pick up suttle clues. Why do I have to know. Why.
I know what you did.
Maybe it was better not knowing.better living in self denial.Would time be proportonal to the actions we do like what einstein said? If so, let me move faster, let me run like the wind and skip this part of life.
Or maybe, just maybe Ive been brought to this situation again and again and yet I run. the easy way out. Do I stick up to it this time. Is it worth sticking up to it. Maybe, just ....just maybe its time I did something different.
Open your eyes.
What do I do now. I cant wait. I cant rush. I cant run. I cant endure. Or maybe I can but I choose not to. Why cant you see..
Look at me
Why? Why not. Maybe its the things I do. The commitment ive placed. I hope you see it the way I see it.
Im beginnning to like my car. Not gonna look for a new one.
I want to keep my old car.Its not for sale.No test driving without me knowing. No, let me rephrase that ; No test-drive. period.
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Getting a car?
It came in with a polished surface. Beautiful on the exterior with a metalic shine on it to top it off. But the car just wouldnt start. The engine dies every few minutes. The wipers wouldnt move. The seats in the car were not that bad, but it obviously needed a little cleaning.
So i started cleaning it, vacuming the seats, fixing the wipers, changed the battery. It took me hours to have it all done. Alas it was clean interiorly. With a sigh of relief, i sat in the front seat of the car, wiping the sweat off my brow. Slided the seatbelt across my chest, placed on feet firmly on the clutch and one on the accelerator.after making sure it is on free gear, I turned the ignition key on.The roaring of the engine was music to my ears...then suddenly it died. I tried again...and it died 2 mins later.
Then I began to realize how insignificant all my hard work had been. I tried cleaning up the interior, fixing what I could fix but the car still needed to stay alive on its own. The engine needed to run...and nothing I can do will keep it running. The most I can do is to start the engine, after that it is the engine that has to choose to continue what I started.
I cant hold on longer. I cant always be the one holding things together. Limitation is reality. As much as I try to bring the best out of it, I can only do so much. The rest..its up to it. I thought a nice exterior would be nice as a car to show off to others. But what is the use of it if it cant run on its own? Whats the use of it if I have to keep starting the engine over and over again just to keep it running?
Do I want to keep this car? I dont know. Or should I start shopping for a better one. I dont know. Is there a car thats good on the exterior,interior, good smooth engine ...and cheap?ahha..not that I cant afford but low maintainence is always an advantage...no?
I think thats why I will always be without a car and would always be walking alone...lol.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Orbituary
*cited from The Star paper on the 21st of Jan.*
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For the man who had nothing...and defied all odds and circumstances to have made something out of nothing ...through hard work..and now..
is remembered as the man who left behind a legacy of succesful children and gandchildren...
We...are.... his legacy...
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Trust
This predicament is nothing cryptic.Gone through it a million times and yet still awaiting for a definitive answer. It is as though a moment of frisson was stucked somewhere in the lower lobe of my lung, The sensation of it leaping out yet with strain and agony I hold it back within, supressing it down. For what reason, I do not know. Maybe I'm afraid.Dauntedly apprehensive of what it might become.
One thing comes to mind. Trust.
Suspiciously a childish term used to encourage oneself in times of dilemma. Choices certainly do get bigger as we grow older. Trouble is not only are the choices necessary but the thought of living through the consequences of it for the rest of my life is horrifying.
Yet, Trust.
But what do I trust in?Trust doesnt give me an answer on which to choose? Trust doesnt show me how to choose them. Trust doesnt answer any of my questions!!
But still the word flashes in mind, Trust.
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding"
Thursday, January 01, 2009
Bye 2008
The young and futile mind would revolve around materialism, money and popularity. Why? Have we ever wondered why? Have we ever considered or thought of why do we want so badly for people around to notice us? Why do we care about what people might think of us? Everyone, unless you live in your own denial, does to a certain extend care about what others may think of them, hence the dressing, the character, the outlook appearance.
But having achieved all these by the age of 20(too a certain extend that is), helps me cherish this Christmas all the more. I realize that this Christmas, I wasnt looking forward to gifts or presents but more so I looked forward to cards and wishes and company. I diddnt need people to buy me things, I could buy them on my own. I didnt need more money, I have more than what I need. I diddnt need to be more popular, I have a wide enough circle of friends. But one thing I cherished most this Christmas, were words of encouragement, Christmas cards written, letters, sms, e-mails. Those are the stuff I cant buy with my own money, those are the things earned from every drop of sweat this year.And some come undeservingly.
I realize the gift I had this year was not something that was tangible but rather a character that would last a long time...
Thanks 2008.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Decisions
The altercation in the mind is only but a silent killer that awakes from the inside and would well be hidden through the phase of life. It goes about unnoticed, subtle yet real. Often leading to despondency , oblivious to what had been the cause of it. Sufficiency of reason depletes as the altercation grows louder and louder and a cry from the inside screams out for peace ..in the mind. The birth of indecisiveness and irrationality soon becomes apparent. Adversary of oneself becomes the toughest challenge in life. Decisions ,no doubt chooses the journey and the pathway of life.
Decisions is always a constant struggle. Dilemma was becoming more of a friend. But as the sequential movements of events in what we measure as 'time' soon passes, and the facets of life scrutinized from hindsight, It becomes more obvious of the fact that choices and decisions made are in no relation to age but relates directly to the maturity of a person. The scale of decision making suddenly becomes subjective to the individual . It becomes like a thumbprint that everyone would have a different character, a different anxiety, a different goal, a different motive to every decision making. Although the decision might somewhat similar to another person, but if circumstances ,sequence of events and emotions were taken into consideration, it is a whole new, different decision altogether.
If this is true, then is it not also true that no one would be able to FULLY comprehend what another is going through?Maybe it is possible to a certain extend , but to take everything else into consideration, the greatest degree of understanding would never be achievable by a mere human being. The life gone through is a masterpiece itself.
Who then do we turn to?Who then do we seek?
Maybe, just maybe...thats why we need God.
Thats just me, but most importantly what do you think?
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
You are near
Ok its time to unleash the song i composed more than a year ago
It was composed on 30th November 2007. Its still in my old blog post.=)
If you guys want to have a look at the old post CLICK HERE
Let me know what you guys think =)
You can stream it from here
Or download it from the link below
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