Getting a car?

 It came in with a polished surface. Beautiful on the exterior with a metalic shine on it to top it off. But the car just wouldnt start. The engine dies every few minutes. The wipers wouldnt move. The seats in the car were not that bad, but it obviously needed a little cleaning. 

So i started cleaning it, vacuming the seats, fixing the wipers, changed the battery. It took me hours to have it all done. Alas it was clean interiorly. With a sigh of relief, i sat in the front seat of the car, wiping the sweat off my brow. Slided the seatbelt across my chest, placed on feet firmly on the clutch and one on the accelerator.after making sure it is on free gear, I turned the ignition key on.The roaring of the engine was music to my ears...then suddenly it died. I tried again...and it died 2 mins later.

Then I began to realize how insignificant all my hard work had been. I tried cleaning up the interior, fixing what I could fix but the car still needed to stay alive on its own. The engine needed to run...and nothing I can do will keep it running. The most I can do is to start the engine, after that it is the engine that has to choose to continue what I started. 

I cant hold on longer. I cant always be the one holding things together. Limitation is reality. As much as I try to bring the best out of it, I can only do so much. The rest..its up to it.  I thought a nice exterior would be nice as a car to show off to others. But what is the use of it if it cant run on its own? Whats the use of it if I have to keep starting the engine over and over again just to keep it running?

Do I want to keep this car? I dont know. Or should I start shopping for a better one. I dont know. Is there a car thats good on the exterior,interior, good smooth engine ...and cheap?ahha..not that I cant afford but low maintainence is always an advantage...no?

I think thats why I will always be without a car and would always be walking alone...lol.